


Overthinking Confessions (Ishimondo)

by 7Gay_Lizard



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, Dangan Ronpa: Trigger Happy Havoc
Genre: Alternate Universe - No Killing Game (Dangan Ronpa), Alternate Universe - Non-Despair (Dangan Ronpa), Angst, Cross-Posted on Wattpad, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Gay, Gay Male Character, My First AO3 Post, Other, Trigger Happy Havoc, danganronpa - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-13
Updated: 2020-12-29
Packaged: 2021-03-08 00:01:24
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 6,169
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26986360
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/7Gay_Lizard/pseuds/7Gay_Lizard
Summary: Non-despair AU:Mondo makes and plans many failed confessions to say to Kiyotaka, leaving him on a cliffhanger that causes thoughts Taka have had for a while to worsen into.. despairNot only are the two suffering to maintain just their friendship with each other, some other issues involving their class will need solving---Warning - this may have some triggering topics, all of them will be tagged at the beginning of the chapters
Relationships: Fujisaki Chihiro & Ishimaru Kiyotaka & Kuwata Leon & Oowada Mondo, Fujisaki Chihiro & Kuwata Leon & Oowada Mondo, Hagakure Yasuhiro/Kuwata Leon, Ishimaru Kiyotaka & Oowada Mondo, Ishimaru Kiyotaka/Oowada Mondo, Kuwata Leon & Maizono Sayaka, Kuwata Leon & Maizono Sayaka & Naegi Makoto, Maizono Sayaka & Naegi Makoto
Comments: 24
Kudos: 92





	1. Attempt

**Author's Note:**

> Edited the first few chapters, I swear it gets better later on  
> This is my first fanfic Im posting on here that started as a joke but I like the idea now.. so I'm posting here so I'd appreciate any tips and hope anyone reading this will enjoy it!!
> 
> Sorry if updates are long (and if they're out of characters some/or most times)

As the yawning Mondo arises from bed, all on his mind was the thoughts trailing from last night. His thoughts on how he could attempt to confess to his closest friend

Who yes, was also his past rival, but with the time they've spent together, they grew to be extremly close to the other

Mondo was never fond of planning, he knew he should attempt to plan this through if he wanted a chance, so, swinging his legs over his bed he opened his drawer. Owada grabbed his favorite pen and a black notebook that had a small pride sticker on it

He opens the book to page 56, taking his pen, delicately writing out a confession and the various ways his former rival, bestfriend, and crush, would react.

This was _phase one_ of the confession,

Brainstorming:

Mondo thought to himself, 'Call Taka

If he doesn't pick up: he should but if he doesn't either wait for him or call Leon, he might know something

If he does:

Confess straight away

Actually don't do that... that's pretty stupid, just confirm with him that nothin in our friendship will be weird.. then you could confess if you want

what if he rejects me?! But if I never tell him then we wont know..

If he accepts my confession: then go on a date.. I haven't really planned this out but he seems more of the planning type so I could let him deal with that one

If he rejects me: pretend it never happen and go back to being friends, pining in the distance like I do now..' his brainstorming cane to an end. He was quite stubborn when it came to things like this

Mondo closes the book and toses it at the end of his bed, "God damnit why do I try"

He buries his head in his hands with a long groan, "He used to hate me, for valid reasons, I was and still am an asshole. What makes me think he'd LOVE me"

"Fuckin hell.. I hate shit like this" he drops his head back on his pillow to rest a bit and clear his mind

He sucked at planning and was even worse with going through with his thoughts

It was a constant headache to get any of his true feelings out, he either yelled from nervousness or ran away from the problem

Neither benefited him, as seen from his past record of having a rejection streak of over 10 people

Why couldn't he be upfront like Leon? Sure, Mondo thought of him as a moron, and he did get flustered around his crushes but he could admit his feelings unlike, unlike THE famously known Ultimate Biker Gang Leader

After about 15 minutes of thinking this through, he grabbed a glass of soda chugging it down with his fear

_Phase two_ of Mondo's plan was to occur any minute now, it was taking action he had a set time to do this so here goes nothing..

With trembling hands he reaches for the phone, dialong in Kiyotaka's number he gulps down his fear, "haha... moment of truth"

*ring, ring*

"C'mon Taka, pick up man.."

A few seconds later he hears a voice right before he had lost hope, "Hello, Mondo? Everything alright?"

Mondo lets out a sigh of relief that he even answered, "heyyyy Taka.. do you have a moment to talk?"

"Of course bro, what's wrong?"

The word 'bro' made Mondo flinch. It made him feel he was being friendzoned which is the last thing he wanted right now

"Heh, nothing's wrong, I just wanted to talk bout a topic I havent really discussed in the year we've been friends.. because it's something friends discuss" a moment of silence pasts

"What's this.. topic Owada?" Kiyotaka asks with a pinch of eagerness

"You won't make fun of me or anything bad right?"

"Of course not, I doubt you could've done anything horrible" he emphasized the word horrible, meaning it has to be something totally outrageous for him to hate Mondo, "so don't worry, I will always be your friend, go ahead!" Ishimaru declared

"It's 'bout a crush I have.."

"Oh." The excitement in him fades upon hearing that, "Who's.. the lucky person, if you want to say"

"That's the thing, I want to say but I'm scared about them rejecting me.. they're one of my friends and I don't wanna lose them. Any advice?"

"If they stop being friends with you because you liked them then I don't think you guys should've been friends to begin with" Kiyotaka chuckles, "no, seriously, I'm not great at advice like this but no one could hate you over that Owada!"

"I guess that makes sense"

"So, do you want to tell me who it is?"

"You wish nerd."

Ishimaru went with the logical approach, "Technically yes, I do wish because it doesnt seem you're gonna tell anytime soon"  
  


"Ah, forget I mentioned it, good evenin' Taka"

The phone hung up before Taka could reply, he looked off into the sunset, set his phone down and contemplated what Mondo said, he quietly whispered to himself his thoughts

"Who would he like.. maybe Sakura, they're both extremely strong.. or Kyoko.. she's quite mysterious for sure, or maybe even someone from class 77, like Sonia for example..

There's no reason he would have to like me, I'm just THAT strict and boring hall monitor"

He took a deep breath, thoughts filled his head, one of them standing out 'a hall monitor with dreams that feel unreachable'

His mood totally spoiled, there wasn't even a reason to be upset about it, he should be happy his bestfriend is taking interest in people


	2. Unmotivated

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After the awkard encounter last night, we take a peek into how they're feeling, and what their plans are.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One, AHHH the fact this is getting attention is surprising, any and all of the support is highly appreciated (at the time this was written there were 27, I'm updating this idk how long after, 1-2 months?? And there's like 80+ now.. i love you all /p)💗

**TW: intrusive/negative thoughts**

Mondo squeezes his eyes shut almost immediately after opening them "arghh what's with tha-"

"Wakey, Wakey, stupid"

Mondo jumped out of shock, "fuck- Leon? What the hell u doin here?"

"Nothin. Just thought I'd pass by and see if you wanted to join me and Chihiro for breakfast"

"Sure sure.." his words trailed off as his eyelids weighed heavy

"HellllllO?" Mondo springs up, "yeah of course, just- jus leave my room aye?"

"Whatever you say" Leon teased as he closed the door leaving Mondo alone to get dressed

—

Firstly, let's check on Kiyotaka, shall we?

'Last night was pretty awkward and embarrassing on my part but Taka seemed fine' The biker thought, grabbing his phone from his bedside table

"Taka, bro.. how ya doing?"

He always felt nervous texting people, he wasn't good with deciphering tones or body language so it left him with a sort of uncomfy feeling in his stomach

5 minutes later and no reply, not all that shocked since Kiyotaka didn't always check his phone nor had his ringer on

Despite the fear circling his mind he got up to change, sliding on a shirt (he didn't sleep with one on usually), and changing from red shorts to some black sweatpants.

Hearing chattering from behind the door, he creaked it open to see his two friends playing around

Chihiro looks over Leon's shoulder and waves to Mondo once he notices him

"Hey lil dudee"

"Mondo!! Glad you're finally ready"

"Yeaa! Let's go!" Leon grins shaking the few charms on his phone case

"Oi, hol up, I forgot my phone"

Leon rolled his eyes.. "Go get it what are you waiting for??" He presses his index finger to his forehand while Mondo ran back into the bedroom

Still, no notification from Taka.. just great

What was going on with that kid?

—

30 minutes before hand, Ishimaru was lying in bed, "What's there to do today, it's Sunday and I don't really have plans.. like I don't any Sunday" he light heartedly mumbled to himself, mentioning whatever came to his mind

He turns over, Sunday was his only break day but today he was feeling a bit, depressed

Why? Is this because of last night? Why would it be though? That's a dumb thing to get upset over.. 

He laid there, staring at the ceiling when he feels his phone vibrate under his pillow, "huh? This early?" It was 9:45 a.m., usually the very few people he talks to, wouldn't be up so early on a Sunday

He looks down to see a message from Mondo, he tries clicking on the notification but he stops himself, sighing and flopping back down on his back

"Im in no mood to socialize.. especially not with you, sorry Owada.."

He could swear he felt a tear run down his cheek as negative explanations to these feelings crept into his head

'Did Owada hate me? Did he feel forced to chat with me like my other friends have in the past? Would he just ditch me once I got too close?'

He tried not giving these painful ideas much attention, they would pop up at the worst times and made him feel horrible about himself

He shut his eyes trying his best efforts to fall asleep, it was one of the only solutions to stopping those thoughts.. for even a small bit of time

Which was all he wanted at this point, peace, peace from the world and his own mind


	3. Consequences

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Time for the guilt to settle in, and both of the guys to learn how to face the consequences of their feelings and possible mishaps

**TW: intrusive/negative thoughts**

The three dudes chuckled as they walked to Leon's car, "c'mon losers get in"

Losers, stupid, and all other sorts of terms people would normally see as an insult, Leon used endearingly

"We know Leon" Chihiro giggled as he gently opened the door to the backseat, on the other side, Mondo swung the door open and hopped in

While Leon was driving, Mondo was looking down at his phone constantly and fidgeting with it here and there

"Um Mondo?"

"Yeah Chi?"

"Is something wrong aha? You keep checking your phone.."

"Nah, i- im just concerned for Taka.. he isn't replying to my text, I think I said something wrong"

"Did you confess?" Leon butts in from the front of the car

"No, I wimped out.."

"Pshh then you're probably fine" Leon brushes it off

Chihiro looks a bit worried and gives an attempted smile, "well, he could just be sleeping?"

"Maybe." The car fell silent, they left the conversation there and drove to the café

—

"Welcome" an awfully cheerful guy greeted the three after they walked in

"He looks high" Mondo nudged Leon

Leon shrugged, "he's kinda hot though"

Mondo just looks to the side.. kinda weirded out since the guy wasn't his type but to hell with it

Chihiro pointed put a table in the back, and the three went to sit down

The waited arrived at their table, "Hi my name is Yasuhiro, what would y'all be interested in today?" The waiter asked

Leon was caught off guard but Mondo intervenes, I'll take a black coffee, that'll be all"

"May I get a glass of water?" Chihiro asks softly

"Of course dude, and you sir?"

Leon gulped "N-not-thhing yet.. thank you" Leon tripped over his words

The waiter walked away and Leon let out a sigh of relief

"Doesn't he go to our school? The weird guy who says he can tell the future.. or has a 30% chance of accuracy while doing so?"

"Yup! He goes to Hope's Peak, and is in our class, he's Yasuhiro Hagakure, the Ultimate Clairvoyant!" Chihiro chimed in

Leon was in disbelief "He does?! I hadn't noticed him.."

Mondo rolls his eyes, "You don't pay attention to like anyone Leon"

Leon shrugs, he knew it was partly true but doesn't mean he has to accept it

"Why don't you just ask for his number?" Mondo suggests, looking at the café's wallpaper

"Sorry, did the biker gang LEADER who doesn't have the guts to tell his bestfriend he's in love with him say somethin?" Leon fires back

"Oi don't-"

Leon cuts Mondo off before he could even start, "Hey. Hey, isn't that Makoto from our class because I DO NOTICE SOME PEOPLE." He stared at Mondo before continuing, "Wait- and he's out with that rich prick?! Damn, I knew he wanted go be friends with everyone but him?"

Mondo and Chihiro glances over, "Kirigiri is also there" Chi adds

"Yeah you're right" Leon stops then covers his mouth with his hand "and they're extremely close, maybe he's poly, pfffft I dont blame him though they're kinda hot-" he turns the right way and sees his two friends giving him a deathly glance.. "so let's ignore them-

"Agreed we shouldnt get in they're business.." Mondo recommends with a serious tone

Yasuhiro brings our drink and Leon asks for a peppermint tea

He comes back out to brings it to them and they continue their chattering before leaving

—

Kiyotaka is opening his eyes again, checking his alarm clock, it now reads 11:28 a.m., "I guess I should do something today.." he yawns, then does morning stretches

He searches through his closet then throws some clothes down on his bed

—

He pats his shirt down in the mirror, making sure it's not wrinkly, then he sits at his desk

"I could use someting to get my mind off of... him. Sketching sounds good, yeah let's go with that"

Kiyotaka pressed the pencil down to the paper and starts drawing what comes to mind, first an apple, then a cube

He cuts them out and tapes then to his wall, they calms his nerves

He leans on his bed frame and checks his phone, he sees another text from Mondo

"Moral Compass" (one of the many nicknames Mondo used for him, this one was one of his favorites, he definitely preferred it over 'hall moniter', or 'perfect' because some reason.. it brought back uneasy memories he couldnt exactly put his finger on)

Going back to the text, "Ayee Moral Compass, did I do somethin wrong? If so, I apologize I just ..." that's where the text cut off

He was debating on whether on not to read the rest of his message or not, he wanted so badly to talk to him but his brain wouldn't allow him to do so, the more he thought about it, the more anxious he got, tossing his phone down on his sheets. Leaning against the headboard of his bed, he curled up into a ball with his legs pressed against his chest.

'What do I even say? He probably doesn't trust me.. have I done something wrong for him to feel that way?' His mind went a bit haywire, was there another reason Mondo didn't tell him about the crush other than crushes being seen as embarrassing?

It didn't help that he tended to overthink the smallest things, he stayed awake a bit longer, still tired but didn't want to move or waste any more time sleeping.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahhh!! This fanfic has actually been getting quite, a bit of attention and I can't thank y'all enough💗 Also to the person who commented, it was only one comment but people like you are the reason I have the motivation to finish these things so tyvm and hopefully you enjoyed the new update!!


	4. Clashing Schedules

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Resuming their usual lives, at a distance that is broken soon after  
> Kiyotaka, who wants space and trying to work out countless of his own problems and Mondo, who had a feeling something is wrong and trying to be close so he can comfort him, doesn't mix well

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TRIGGER WARNING:  
> Mentions of starving, and body image issues

**TW: (implication of) starving, & body image issues**

Ishimaru sat up, and rubbed his eyes as he looked for his phone. He finally finds it buried in his blanket, he pulled it out with the time reading 12:27 p.m., "I got quite.. distracted" his eyes directed over to Mondo's text, "it'd be rude to ghost him all day and I'm feeling.. better at the moment"

Swiftly moving his fingers he wrote a response "Hi Mondo, I was asleep when you sent those texts, I just wanted to let you know I'm fine" It was a harmless white lie.. it was easier to not mention his thoughts so he left it at him being busy all the time

Before he could set his phone down, he got another message, "oh thank god, I was getting really worried are you doing anything today?"

"Ah, not really, just going to study, so if I don't respond it's most likely because my phone will be off"

"boringggg, but I understand that lil man" Mondo sent. Taka couldn't think of anything to respond with, so time to start studying

Kiyotaka sets down the needed equipment, his textbooks, notebooks, and a few pencils in case the first one breaks.

Opening his book he starts to copy down the homework, restating the questions and all before his mind wanders off.. sitting there, Ishimaru smiled softly, being pulled into a warm embrace, caressing his cheek, he looked up to see "Mondo?"- Taka jumped slightly in his chair, "What were you thinking?-"

He stood and slowly paced around the room picking at his nails, "Why a MAN of all people Ishi! Someone who'll never notice my feelings because I can't be straight forward with him" He chuckled and poured out his thoughts, and brushed his hair back in worriedness while he looked at the ground beneath him, making a sudden stop at his mirror

Words would disappear from his mouth as he stood there. Tracing his body with his, judging eyes. He tugged at the side of his pants then started to cling at the clothes surrounding his stomach, He looked as if he was falling ill, "I should take a break.. but studying, grades, approval, my future is more important"

He hugged his sleeves as he felt like he was going to pass out, he was getting very dizzy, and slouched down against the wall, with nothing but the painful silence surrounding him.

*knock, knock* his eyes were glued shut, taking deep breaths

"Ishimaru?" No response was given to the person behind the door

*knock*

Two more knocks came after

"Oi! Taka?" Mondo was waiting for a response, he had used a spare key Ishi gave him, and walked up to his friend's room to check on him

His vision focuses back he tries to think of what's happening, he could've sworn his name was being called

"Hey.. are you still there? You aren't slacking off your studyin are ya?"

'... MONDO! That voice belongs to.. Mondo. Mondo, why is he here?' He thinks to himself on his way to the door

"hi.. Owada, what brings you here?" He says with a half-cheerful voice

"HEYY TAKA!" Mondo shouted causing the genius to jump back a bit. Kiyotaka knew Mondo tends to shout when he's nervous but it never fails to startle him

"Mondo.. you're shouting" Ishimaru told him with a wobbly tone, he was losing his voice earlier that week and the crying really set that in stone, he could barely speak without coughing, luckily from past experiences it would normally only last a day.

"Oh.. sorry" He lowered his voice and eyed Taka up and down, 'his hair is.. all over the place for starters, and he looks kinda ill'

He leans against the door, "have you been taking care of yourself.. like at all?"

"Well-" He was trying to think of what to say when Mondo let himself in, closing the door, "Sit down on your bed and wait for me"

Kiyotaka, not wishing to strain his voice any further, didn't bother asking instead he just nodded and did as he was asked

He was picking dirt out of his fingernails when Mondo plopped onto the bed behind him

Kiyotaka didn't have the energy to complain about it, so he sat there and listened to Mondo

"Can I.. touch your hair?"

"Huh?" Kiyotaka turned to understand what he meant and saw Mondo holding a hairbrush

Small amount of blush lit his face, "it's totally fine"

Mondo brushed the comb through Ishimaru spiky hair, "you're normally so well put together, and not so messy with your appearance"

Kiyotaka laughed it off, he wasn't upset by the claim, he didn't know how he felt, "I wasn't expecting your presence"

Mondo put the brush down for a second, "Don't get me wrong, I think it's cute, I'll probably have to come over more often without notice" he said in a joking manor but he really meant it

Ishimaru hid his smile and chuckled trying to not to get to flustered by the comment

Mondo brought the comb back up and soon finished with Takas hair

"Look at you!!" He smiled holding out a mirror for Kiyotaka to grab

He got anxious grabbing the mirror but when he looked in it, seeing his brushed hair and Mondo smiling behind him eased him, "more slicked back than usual but nice job"

He poked at the spikes while Mondo laid his head on Kiyotaka's shoulder, and wrapped his arms around the shorter man's stomach

Kiyotaka was distracted from his hair

Mondo on the other hand, was concerned, 'wow he sure is thin.. I never really noticed it but he does seem more slender than he was in the past. He also looked kinda ill when I got here, has he been eating?

Wait of course he is, he's always talking about the best of people, he would know it's unhealthy to skip meals.. hah, yeah. Yeah Mondo everything should be fine'

Mondo thought to himself for awhile, trying to reassure himself but only resulted in worst case scenarios popping up in his head

Mondo got off the bed and stretched before suggesting his idea "Hey bro"

Ishimaru put down the mirror and turned to Mondo, "yes?"

"Are you hungry, I would be more than pleased to cook for us"

Kiyotaka instinctively felt his stomach

Taka was sure that Mondo could tell, he hated worrying others, "no, I'm alright, I.. uh, ate this morning when I woke up"

"Didn't you wake up when you sent your first text?"

"Oh.. well no, It's complicated but I did eat"

"Ishimaru.. you're a terrible liar" he laughed

"Wha.. what do you mean, liar?"

"It's whatever, you don't HAVE to eat it but I'm concerned for you and suggest that you do"

"But I have to study and-"

"I'LL make the food Ishi, you can study in the meantime nerd"

Without another word, he shut the door and walked to the kitchen while Ishimaru sat at his desk

Mondo got out the needed ingredients and made Daiya's favorite dish, he perfected it for special occasion and he thought that this would be pretty special, first time cooking for his bestfriend

Kiyotaka spun his pen while he thought about the problem, the answer clicked in his mind after he wrote down multiple different versions of the problem that would look like chicken scratch to anyone but him

Mondo slowly opened the door, holding two plates, he handed one over to Ishimaru

Taka took it graciously

They sat next to each other and began eating

Kiyotaka felt he was being tugged by his heart saying he should just eat it and his mind saying he shouldn't

He took a bite and it tasted good

Kiyotaka was insecure of his appearance, he knew starvation wasn't healthy no matter what though, so he continued to eat anyways since it would be for the best

Mondo and Ishimaru joked about their class and the things that went on in their school while they ate

It was all light hearted as Ishimaru wouldn't want to say anything negative about his classmates

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SORRY IT TOOK SO LONG!! I didnt die,, also I have lots of plans for this fic I just need to work out the timing and all, so hopefully this will work out well and be enjoyable
> 
> I didn't add more cuz Im tired and just wanted to update goodnight/afternoon/morning💗


	5. Regular Night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mondo and Kiyotaka spent the evening together but still have school they have to prepare for the next day, let's see how they're nights are

**TW: nightmares, attempted su*cide**

  
After their little chat, Kiyotaka and Mondo cleaned their dishes and continued on with their studying.  
In reality, Mondo just used his phone and admired Ishimaru, who was working and sometimes looked up at him when he was staring

"Did you need help with any work Owada?"  
Mondo stared at Ishimaru not even realizing he had asked a question  
".. Owada?"  
"Sorry!!! Uh, What'd you say?"  
"Do you need help with any work you may have? You've been staring so I assumed you wanted something" Kiyotaka kept a plain look on his face  
"Oh. No, no I'm good" he immediately looked down at his phone after the awkward encounter  
Ishimaru just smiled and moved on to another subject of work, continuing to check up at Mondo occasionally

Who most times, was looking back at him

A few hours had passed and Mondo checked the clock on his phone, it was just after 5 p.m.  
"Would ya look at that.. it's about time I head out"  
"I would suppose so, have a safe trip home!"  
He hugged Owada once he left the room

And the there was silence once again  
That was.. nice

Mondo thought the same, but was also kinda relieved to be alone for a bit, no worries of saying or doing the wrong thing

Night had come, and Kiyotaka laid in bed, two pillows under his head and one he hugged to his chest  
His mind could only imagine the event that took place earlier, when Mondo had his arms around Ishimaru's waist. It was kinda humiliating since Taka was insecure about his weight, but at the same time, it was warming

Although he wished it was like that more, it was unnatural for two people of the same gender to be like that regularly  
Especially when one had feelings for the other.. it just wasn't right in the slightest he was told

His dad reassured him the day he tried to talk about his feelings, that he'd find his dream wife soon.. sure, his dad loved him and supported him through all of his troubles.. just didn't think he was serious when he said he was gay unless he actually came home with a boyfriend, unfortunately Kiyotaka has only ever had a girlfriend when he questioned being bi so that didn't help his case. His dad told him if he ever had doubts, to talk to his grandfather

Kiyotaka thought about how he lived when he was home, his grandfather specifically.. he ruined the family name, and was probably the least accepting person in his life, he didn't think Taka could succeed since it took him a lot of work to get where he was, he didn't start off perfect  
When he tried coming out, their relationship worsened, he tried coming out quite young, he had these thoughts around 11 and tried expressing them to his grandfather at 13, it didn't go as plan.

He eased his mind and fell asleep

Mondo on the other hand, was restless, he tried every side, position, and even different spots like a chair. No matter what, nothing would let him fall asleep, so he just sat in the kitchen with a glass of water, drinking however many cups until he wasn't thirsty or was tired

It had only been three cups when he felt sick, he washed out the cup and allowed it to drain as he sat down on his bed

He grabbed the stuffed bear, Daiya gave to him when he wasn't there years ago, he normally didn't use it, or liked using it but it helped with his posture and gave him a place to put his arms

So, he did exactly as suspected and hugged the bear until he could finally rest peacefully

Yawning, Kiyotaka awoke and stared at his phone, it was earlier then usual so he turned off his alarms and got ready

He showered before spraying his hair and combing it back

Then grabbed his homework and headed to class early

Once he got there, he set down his bag and started sketching  
Normally it'd be a while until anyone else showed but a very unexpected person dropped their bags down beside Taka, “hey bro”

Ishimaru turned his head to the person and there was Mondo, “Owada?! What are you doing here so early?”  
“Nothing” he rubbed the back of his neck, “just bored and figured you'd be here early”  
Kiyotaka smiled knowing Mondo made an effort to see him  
Mondo directed his attention to the notebook,  
“wow.. I didn't know you kept your sketches in a notebook for when you're bored, let alone you sketched”  
“I have some in my room but it's not a hobby I do all that often” he was too busy with school work most of the time

More students came flooding in the halls while they talked until eventually the bells rang  
Kiyotaka collected his stuff and Mondo helped him up  
They entered class, where Mondo and sat besides Ishimaru

Mondo didn't care to pay attention because he got bored very easily and couldn't focus well so usually he'd stare off into space or at one of his classmates, sometimes even Kiyotaka who was very attentive

The school day went by like normal, teacher teaching up front, chairs squeaking, pens clicking, pencils dropping, annoyed snickers, and kids answering questions, a normal day.

Once the school day ended, Kiyotaka walked down the hall to see Mondo, he called out, ‘Hey Owada, what are you doing after school?”  
There was no response, Mondo kept walking, quickening the pace as he went

‘Is he.. ignoring me?’ Ishimaru thought as he walked after him, for some reason Mondo was running.. up, the stairs so Kiyotaka hurried but made sure not to run when following Mondo

“Mondo! What are you doing? Hello?”  
As he was at the last few steps he tripped, landing on his arms and knees, he looked up to see Mondo standing on the rooftop, he slowly got up and dust the dirt off his pants

“Heh I guess this is a nice place to hang out but why’d you-” he looked back to Mondo after the dirt was off

“HEY! Get away from there Mondo!”  
Mondo stood on the edge, Kiyotaka ran to the other end of the building where Mondo was standing but before he could get half way he stopped dead in his tracks “Ishi..” “yes?”  
Nothing more was said so he repeated but raised his voice, “yes?”

With a smile, Mondo slipped a foot off the building then closed his eyes

Just before anything progressed Ishimaru woke up and scattered around his bed for his phone, finally grabbing it, he saw it was still Monday, and he had one hour to get ready for school

He rubbed the sweat off his forehead, his alarm went off and he stopped it before getting out of bed for the second time today.  
He was scared of what today could hold, but he was determined to change today's outcome if needed

Mondo flipped away from the sunlight, and sat up in his bed. He ran his fingers through his hair before standing  
He gently placed the bear in a chair away from his bed and tried to keep his mind off of Daiya  
When he stared in the mirror however, he could swear he sees him, but when he tries to focus on the image again, it disappears so he assumes he's just tired and puts his hair up in his pompadour

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Im sorry for this.. hopefully it wasn't too trash
> 
> (Plus.. I wrote like the first four?? chapters as a joke since I thought it would flop but the people here actually enjoyed it so Im really glad to be continuing it)


	6. Something's Off Today

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kiyotaka confesses his concerns caused by a supposed 'nightmare' last night, this leads to a more sensitive, discovery
> 
> TW: mention of d*ath

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really haven't updated this in like a month, huh? Well Im back :] and hopefully my writing has improved during that hiatus
> 
> [update 12/31 (6:48 a.m.): I just soent like 1 or 2 hours editing the first 5 chapters.. goodnight
> 
> Also.. why does this have 1k hits- pshshs thanks you,, But woah.. did not expected that ahah

**TW: mention of death**

As the shower’s cold water poured down Kiyotaka’s pale skin, worrying thoughts clouded his head  
He got out shivering from the bathroom fan, then dressed himself

Ishimaru grabs his stuff and leaves to Hope’s Peak

That day in the halls, Leon merges himself between two of his fellow classmates and starts flirting with Sayaka, "Sayaka darling, who needs some loser hope boyfriend when there's frankly the most cool guy in front of you" he smirked, ignoring Makoto’s presence  
"For the last time Leon, Makoto and I aren't even dating, we're just good friends"  
With that Leon moved his attention to Makoto, he pushed Sayaka to the side, "Naegi.. right? Never paid attention to you before, but you're a very attractive young man" he laughs, but it was truly, a genuine remark  
Makoto got all flustered and Sayaka pushed Leon back as revenge before telling him off, "I give you music lessons you can't push ME around"  
"Wait I was joking please don't be mad, I'm very thankful for your help I swear" he begged  
She laughed and said she wasn't serious, they then entered the class and continued their chat in there  
Kiyotaka had only not gone in yet, because he was waiting for Mondo, the teacher tells the kids in the hall there are five minutes left and Taka was going to let himself in and wait for Mondo inside when he heard his name being called, Mondo ran up and put his hand on Ishimaru's shoulder, "hey bro"  
"Goodmorning Owada, you're early for a change"  
"Yeah, well I said I would see you, so I didn't wanna seem like I was ditching my promise"  
The day continues, and everyone goes to their respected classes

Luckily Ishimaru was able to focus on his school work for the most part, but once school was almost done for the day, his mind started to race again, he paid close attention to Owada, and once the bell rang, he grabbed his items, and followed Mondo out of the room  
Just like his dream, Mondo was heading upstairs, Kiyotaka called out “Hey, Owada, wait up!”  
No response.

Kiyotaka stopped for a minute.. this couldn't be like that, that was a dream, and this is reality, of course it was different  
He quickly made his way over, making sure not to run, and eventually got close again, “Mondo?”  
Mondo took one of his headphones out and looked behind him, “Oh hey.. Ishi”  
“Where are you headed?” He asked trying to delay Mondo’s walk  
“Just to the roof to clear my head” Mondo looked saddened, Kiyotaka gave a worrying glance  
“Can I join you?”  
“Oh… sure” he gave a light hearted smile before going back to his normal expression

They reached their destination and sat on the roof, “is something wrong by any chance?”  
Mondo looked over, “why do you ask?”  
“You seemed bummed out.. and I couldn't help but worry about something else”  
“Something… else?”  
“A dream. You died in it, in an unpleasant way and I wasn't sure if it had meant something so I decided to ask you if you had any bad thoughts.. sorry if that's weird”  
“Not at all. You're right I have kind of lost my interest in today, I thought maybe this would be the year but I'm still weak..”  
Mondo took a long pause, dropping his head, “Today is the anniversary of it, my brother's death”  
“Mondo.. that's terrible, I had no clue today held that type of meaning”  
“It's alright, I was gonna head to his grave, which is why I guess you could say I've been a bit distant today”  
“I could accompany you!”  
Mondo stares at him, the corners tugged into a small smile “that would be nice. Thanks”

“We'll have to walk.. I didn't bring it because of the fear if you understand that”  
“I think I can grasp that” Kiyotaka answered

The wind kept their hair out of their face as they peacefully walked, creating small talk

\---

Mondo kneeled down, placing a flower he kept in his jacket on the grave, there were a couple of withered flowers from last year, he tossed them into the nearest trash can before sitting back down in front of the grave  
“Do you want to talk about it, I'm willing to listen if you do” His best friend offered.  
Taka didn't know how else to provide comfort as he didn't have siblings, let alone a dead one

“A few years back, he was hosting his retirement party. I challenged him to one last race, I wanted to prove that I was better or even just as good as him. Wanted it so much that I acted reckless”  
He looked up at the sky, “He saw that I was going to get hurt.. and moved in the way of the truck. It- it hit him, and I was full of panic and he seemed so composed, he told me to take care of the gang for him”

Kiyotaka sat beside him, still listening  
“But I'm just a screw up.. the gang would hate me if they knew the truth, how I killed my brother so I could be better!” His voice became louder at the end, and tears rolled down his face  
“Mondo, you didn't kill anyone..”  
“But he should be alive, and still would be if I could just accept that I'd always be in his shadow. Fuck, I still am even AFTER his death”  
He placed his head in the palms of his hands  
Ishimaru rubbed circles on Mondo’s back, “you can't change what happened in the past, and I know you blame yourself, but I doubt he'd want you to”  
“He must hate me, I mean, I survived and he didn't, why wouldn't he blame me for that”  
“He risked his life for you” Kiyotaka stared into Owada’s lilac eyes and wiped the tears shedding from them, “he loved you, and he would be so proud of who you are. You're one of the best people I know, and sure I didn't know your brother well, but I think he'd feel the same”

Mondo lightly took Ishi’s hand off of his face and wiped away his tears, he held Kiyotaka's hand between both of his shaking ones  
“Thanks” he said quietly, leaning his friend's shoulder  
“No problem..” the smaller boy added his free hand on Mondo’s still shaking hands and lightly rubbed the other man’s knuckles with his thumb, a tactic his father used on him to help him calm down when he was overwhelmed

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've planned like 3-4¿ chapters that I can't even get to yet because I still have a whole arc to include with another character- which will provide a problem.. for a couple of different characters :))


End file.
